What’s destroying some Catholic marriages? The answer may surprise you

What’s destroying some Catholic marriages? The answer may surprise you

Credit: conrado via www.shutterstock.com.

Credit: conrado via www.shutterstock.com.

.- Of the countless Catholic couples who have come through Father T.G. Morrow’s office in Washington D.C. for marriage counseling, two remain imprinted in the priest’s mind even today.

In many ways, these two Catholic couples were the ideal; they were open to life, they formed their children in the faith and they frequented the sacraments.

But both of these marriages fell apart. The culprit? Anger.

“Anger is a poison,” Fr. Morrow, a moral theologian and author of“Overcoming Sinful Anger” (Sophia Press, 2014) told CNA. “If a husband and a wife are angry with each other a lot, it destroys the relationship. It makes it so painful that people want to get out of that relationship.”

Everyone experiences the feeling of anger. It’s a natural, uncontrollable response to the behavior of others, he said. And anger can sometimes be righteous – St. Thomas Aquinas once said anger that’s aligned with reason is praiseworthy. But most often that natural response of anger morphs into sinful anger, which is motivated by a desire for revenge, the priest noted.

And this sinful anger has a devastating effect on relationships.

“It’s extremely important that people realize that (anger) can be a very serious thing, especially if they have major outbursts that really hurt other people,” Fr. Morrow said.

Anger is so destructive that many marriage experts recommend couples have five positive interactions for every negative interaction.

“This anger, when it’s expressed badly, is a poison to every relationship,” he said. “Married people need especially to be careful about this…to work on this and to overcome this.”

Since the feeling of anger is natural and unavoidable, Fr. Morrow said it is important to know how to express anger or displeasure in an effective and positive way. The first step: decide if it is worth getting angry.

“People get angry about little, trifling things,” he said. “You have to say “Is this worth getting angry about?” If not, then you have to let it go. Just forget it.”

If your anger is justified and a confrontation would promote the good of the other, use humor or diplomacy to express your anger. If a confrontation would not promote the good of the other, then Fr. Morrow suggested offering that anger to God as a sacrifice for your sins and the sins of the world.

“(Anger) won’t go away automatically in one try,” he explained. “We have to keep giving it to God as a sacrifice.”

Fr. Morrow said this approach to anger does not mean every person should suddenly become a doormat who is too cowardly to express dissatisfaction with the actions of another.

He used the example of St. Monica, the mother of St. Augustine of Hippo. Many of the men in Tagaste at the time had violent tempers, and St. Monica’s husband was no exception. When he would come home and yell at St. Monica, she would stay quiet. Some time after her husband’s explosion of anger, St. Monica would approach her husband and calmly address his treatment of her and his complaints.

“She was the furthest thing from a doormat,” Fr. Morrow explained. “She had a specific goal that she wanted to become holy and she wanted to covert her son. She pursued her goals ardently and as a result she converted her violent husband and eventually converted Augustine.”

For more information, check out Fr. Morrow’s book “Overcoming Sinful Anger” (Sophia Press, 2014). The 102-page book reads like a manual and draws from Fr. Morrow’s experience as a marriage counselor and spiritual director and his doctorate in Sacred Theology from the Pope John Paul II Institute for Studies on Marriage and Family.

Read more from the source & comments: http://www.catholicnewsagency.com/news/whats-destroying-some-catholic-marriages-the-answer-may-surprise-you-36178/

Here-under are some articles about family and marriage for you to read or watch: 

  1. Getting to know you, please click this link: http://www.pagadiandiocese.org/?p=284
  2. Be Positive, please click this link: http://www.pagadiandiocese.org/?p=288
  3. Love and Marriage, please click this link: http://www.pagadiandiocese.org/?p=292
  4. Endless Love – Marriage after all, please click this link: http://www.pagadiandiocese.org/?p=294
  5. Say it with love, please click this link: http://www.pagadiandiocese.org/?p=298
  6. Quality family moments, please click this link: http://www.pagadiandiocese.org/?p=300
  7. Secret of successful marriage, please click this link: http://www.pagadiandiocese.org/?p=302
  8. The vocation of marriage, please click this link: http://www.pagadiandiocese.org/?p=1968
  9. Marriage as Covenant, please click this link: http://www.pagadiandiocese.org/?p=1974
  10. Humility: Foundation for Marital Happiness, please click this link: http://www.pagadiandiocese.org/?p=1986
  11. Gratitude: Foundation for marriage, please click this link: http://www.pagadiandiocese.org/?p=1980
  12. True Meaning of marriage, please click this link: http://www.pagadiandiocese.org/?p=1972
  13. Marriage and incompatibility, please click this link: http://www.pagadiandiocese.org/?p=2112
  14. Love is a garden, please click this link: http://www.pagadiandiocese.org/?p=2116
  15. Three kinds of love, please click this link: http://www.pagadiandiocese.org/?p=2095

Saint Pope John Paul II’s Theology of the Body in Video Presentation

Sophia Sketchpad – Marriage

Sacraments 101: Matrimony (Why make it Catholic?)

A love that is life long: The marriage God wants for you

What’s destroying some Catholic marriages?

Divorce’s many victims

What Catholics need to know about marriage and sex, Part 2

Can a Catholic sign a pre-nuptial agreement?

We want Church truth on marriage, young Catholics say

An Open Letter to the Adulterers Outed by the Ashley Madison Hackers

Pro-life, Married & Contracepting: Is there a problem?

Pope Francis’ General Audience: The Family is an irreplaceable source of stability for children

The 4 most important parts of marriage

Pre-Cana with St. John Chrysostom: 7 Tips to a successful marriage

44 Sins against the sacrament of marriage

Live-in: Research facts and analysis on cohabitation

Pope Francis: When families teach forgiveness, they strengthen society

THIS EUROPEAN NATION JUST FOUGHT THE GAY AGENDA AND WON – Pope Francis lent a hand http://www.pagadiandiocese.org/2015/12/23/this-european-nation-just-fought-the-gay-agenda-and-won-pope-francis-lent-a-hand/

“God himself is the author of marriage” (GS 48:1). The vocation of marriage is written in the very nature of man and woman as they came from the hand of the Creator. Marriage is not a purely human institution despite the many variations it may have undergone through the centuries in different cultures, social structures, and spiritual attitudes (CCC:1603)

FBI Homosexuality click below:

FBI (Faith Based Investigation): Homosexuality

Many believe the Freemasons are simply a centuries-old charitable fraternity. However, the Catholic Church has consistently condemned Freemasonry more than any other error in its history because it promotes indifferentism, naturalism, communism, and other dangerous philosophies.

PRIEST SEX ABUSE IS ALL ABOUT HOMOSEXUALITY http://www.pagadiandiocese.org/2015/12/14/priest-sex-abuse-is-all-about-homosexuality/

THE VORTEX: BLACKMAIL? COVER-UP? Did the New York archdiocese buy Fr. Miqueli’s silence? http://www.pagadiandiocese.org/2015/12/16/the-vortex-blackmail-cover-up-the-vortex-blackmail-cover-up-did-the-new-york-archdiocese-buy-fr-miquelis-silence/

THE VORTEX: HIDING GAY PRIESTS http://www.pagadiandiocese.org/2015/12/14/the-vortex-hiding-gay-priests/

THE VORTEX: DAMAGE CONTROL TIME – This could be the end for Cardinal Dolan http://www.pagadiandiocese.org/2015/12/15/the-vortex-damage-control-time-this-could-be-the-end-for-cardinal-dolan/

Homosexuality, the Grave Evil Presented as Good with Q & A, Part 1 & 2

Homosexuality, the Grave Evil Presented as Good

FBI: Homosexuality with Question & Answer

Homosexuals and Freemasons inside the Church

Homosexual and Freemasons Inside the Church

“The Rite of Sodomy” Homosexuality in the Roman Catholic Church

“The Rite of Sodomy” Homosexuality in the Roman Catholic Church

Mic’d Up: Homosexuality is intrinsically disordered

Mic’d Up “Pink Money and the Homosexual Mafia” 

Please click this link to watch the video on Mic’d Up “Pink Money and the Homosexual Mafia”

Michael Voris gives a series of short talks, answering questions coming in response to his talk on homosexuality in Nigeria.

In this talk from Nigeria, Michael Voris speaks about the grave evil presented as good – homosexuality. Catechism of Catholic Church teaches that, “Homosexuality refers to relations between men or between women who experience an exclusive or predominant sexual attraction toward persons of the same sex. It has taken great variety of forms through the centuries and in different cultures. Its psychological genesis remains largely unexplained. Basing itself on Sacred Scripture, which presents homosexual acts as acts of grave depravity (cf. Gen 19:1-29; Rom 1:24-27; 1 Cor 6:10; 1 Tim 1:10), tradition has always declared that ‘homosexual acts are intrinsically disordered” (CDF, Persona humana 8). They are contrary to the natural law. They close the sexual act to the gift of life. They do not proceed from a genuine affective and sexual complementarity. Under no circumstances can they be approved” (CCC: 2357).

The Cost of Abortion & Contraception Deception click below:

The Cost of Abortion and Contraception Deception

Catholic Bishops: Voting for Candidate who supports abortion is formal cooperation with evil

Eclipse of Reason – Live Abortion Documentary/Pro-Life Anti-Abortion Video

Stojan Adasevic: A communist abortionist turned pro-life after a saint visited him

12-year-old speaks out on the issue of abortion

Who is behind the murderers in abortion?

Abortion and the Bill and Melinda Gates Foundation

Is there a link between abortion, contraception and breast cancer?

Abortion and Eucharist by Michelle Yax

Please click this link to watch on Abortion with Movie: From Old Testament, New Testament & Fathers of the Church Teaching to Present Day

Bible’s Teachings Against Abortion

US Representative Nancy Pelosi vs. The Catholic Church on Abortion Issue

8 Unbelievably heartbreaking quotes from women who aborted their babies

Is there Ethics of Abortion?

Abortion Warns of Something Worse?

‘We’re killing babies all over the place!’ – Dr. Ben Carson

Ben Carson: They say abortion is about women’s rights but what about the baby?

Help to abolish abortion: Turn the tide 2012 Pro-life video

Discovering Natural Family Planning

Pro-life Song and Video: Stand Up For Life

Planned Parenthood Videos Put a Spotlight on Another Issues: Procurement Companies

Video: Laughing abortionists ‘pull out baby hearts after abortion, just for fun’. It’s cute.

Undercover pro-life investigator: I saw evil in the face of late-term abortionist

Forensic report finds Planned Parenthood video are authentic and unaltered

US Bishop issues major call for men to join the battle for life & family: ‘We need to get off the sidelines’

Pope Francis: Life must be defended in all its stages

Into the breach: An Apostolic Exhortation to Catholic Men, My Spiritual Sons in the Diocese of Phoenix

Does God want Christians to stand up against the injustice of abortion? Here’s what the Bible says…

Related Articles/ Videos on Euthanasia click below:

Pope Francis denounces “false compassion” behind abortion and Euthanasia

Rejecting Euthanasia, Respecting the Human Spirit

Euthanasia is always wrong; You do not kill innocent people

Michael Voris talks an in-depth discussion of the true, financial cost of abortion and its effects to the United States. Catechism of the Catholic Church teaches that, “The inalienable rights of the person must be recognized and respected by civil society and the political authority. These human rights depend neither on single individuals nor on parents; nor do they represent a concession made by society and the state; they belong to human nature and are inherent in the person by virtue of the creative act from which the person took his origin. Among such fundamental rights one should mention in this regard every human being’s right to life and physical integrity from the moment of conception until death” (CDF, Donum vitae III; CCC: 2273).

Contraception & the New Dark Age, Part 1-4: Where we are & How we got here by Dr. Martin Brenner click below:

Contraception & the New Dark Age, Part 1-4: Where we are & How we got here?

CIA: The Rockefeller Foundation – Actively Undermining the Catholic Church click below:

CIA: Rockefeller Foundation – Actively Undermining the Catholic Church

We are used to thinking of the Rockefellers as simply a byword for wealth, power and financial success. Perhaps we might think of them as determined businessmen or see them as great philanthropists. But the truth is far different; the Rockefeller Foundation is actively undermining the Catholic Church, and in the process, attempting to erase man’s natural orientation to the eternal.

Global Warming Unmasked click below:

Global Warming Unmasked

Are the environmental movements and groups simply devoted to laudable, correct stewardship of God’s creation, or do they have a more sinister, hidden agenda? Is “global warming” being used as an excuse for something far darker? Is the final goal of the liberal elites behind the push of junk science population control, eugenics and Gaia worship?

Mic’d Up “Is Contraception Killing the Church?” click below:

Mic’d Up: Is Contraception Killing the Church?

This week on Mic’d Up we’ll be tackling the terrible scourge of Contraception on the Church. Michael Hichborn and Rey Flores from American Life League will join us to expose Catholic Relief Services complicity with Organizations who support contraception and to Discuss The Pill Kills Day of Action 2014. Also joining us will be Lynn Mills who will be discussing the continued prayer rally at Providence Park Hospital in the Archdiocese of Detroit because of their complicity in abortion, contraception and sterilization. Following that same thread we’ll break down the announcement from Detroit Archbishop Allen Vigneron concerning the crisis of parish closings facing Detroit. Also dropping by will be author James Kalb, to discuss the plague of pluralism on the Church’s Hierarchy.